“I like anything that GUSHES…don’t you?”

“F*ck Wes Craven!  Daymares are the NEW nightmares.”

“My visor isn’t the only thing that’s going to turn backside up tonight!”

“I’m sure you’ll agree that these fluorescent lights are far scarier than my face.”

“What a woody.”

For the record, recycling Police Caution tape into a tube top is very Lady Gay Gay.

If the piece of cloth covering your crotch can double as a slingshot…then, it’s time to get new underpants.

JR: I’m not sure what to say about this photo…

JN:  Holy mother of christ.

JR:  All i got is “Dangerous LeGAYsons,”  And that doesn’t seem quite right.

JN:  It’s better than “Charlie’s Gayngels.”

JR:  I suppose so.

JN:  Are those bullet holes in the backdrop?

JR:  I think so.

JN:  Because if so, someone missed…and I am forever mad at them because of it.

“I said I wanted a TWINK for my birthday, but this…THIS IS A TINK!”

“Anita Bryant’s nightmares are our reality.”

“Spell check is totally gay.”

One way or another…everyone gets f*cked in Vegas.

“Come for the luxuriously coiffed eyebrows…stay for the outrageously refined beard.”

I showed my boyfriend this picture.  And this is the exchange that followed…

JR: Uh…look at this.

BOYFRIEND:  What is going on there?

JR: I don’t know.

BOYFRIEND:  Are his nipples really that big?

JR: I think they are just painted.

(JR leans in to computer screen for a closer look)

JR: Yes.  They are just painted.

BOYFRIEND: Oh.  Thank GOD.

Friends don’t let friends dress up like a one person gay pride parade.  Especially during the gay pride “off season.”